help, please!

[astro_mcfly]

Hello. My user name is astro_mcfly and I am not only an Astro Boy fan, but a Back to the Future fan, too. Anyways, I am an artist and hopefully, a future author from the state of Michigan, and I need your help!
My longest story, a work of science fiction, is almost sixty pages long, and I need to have an opinion from someone who doesn't really know me that well. That may sound weird, but I'm sure someone will like this story.

This story is about a three foot tall, amber eyed, cute little girl named Michi, who has no real idea who she could be. But after meating a girl named Aisuru and her father, Dr.Kagaku, a scientist, that may change. After hearing the tragic story of the doctor's second daughter, and a simple photoghaph that she saw in his house, could this change Michi's life forever? A simple "who" could change to "what".

If that sounds like something you would be interrested in, just post here!
Thank you!
astro_mcfly http://www.freewebs.com/trixie_uran91/

[fafner]

2 notes on your site:
1) It doesn't work very well with old computers
2) The mean people you talk about are not "hackers" , but "crackers" , they are not the same

Otherwise I would be interested in having a look at your story

[Strange Wings]

Hi Astro McFly and welcome aboard!

I also have always been a big BTTF fan, and I have to say your story sounds quite interesting.
Have you noticed yet that Dr. Elefun resembles a bit like Doc Emmet Brown?
(Apart from their noses and their waist's size )

[astro_mcfly]

Well, my story's not on my site. Yes, I wasn't thinking on the day I made that site. Lots of stuff was going on. Strangewings, I never really thought of that, but I'm glad I hade something to make my morning good. Ha ha ha! Yes, I could always e-mail the first chapter of my story to whoever is interrested instead of posting to my site! I also forgot to add that my story takes place in the years 1949 and 1951.

Thanks,
Nat

Now that I look at those pictures you posted, I have the Back to the Future cards in card protecters on my wall. (Laughs again.)
My email is astrogirl1218@mac.com

[fafner]

Don't agree... Dr. Elefun lacks that... peculiar light in the eyes that makes that Doc is... well, Doc

[astro_mcfly]

I think it's more of the white hair thing going on.
Yep, Doc is an individual, but that last picture did remind me of the scene in the first movie where Marty goes to Doc's 1955 home. "Do you know what this means?..."
On the BTTF.com message board, my username is I_Love _Marty


“Michi’s eyes didn’t have a color to them, or did they?” they thought. They were sometimes black, sometimes amber brown. Her eyes glittered abnormally under the light. As she had known all along, there was a secret about Michi that Michi herself did not even know to be true.
Michi began to show her insecurity. Her emotions took over from there. “What is wrong with me?” She asked. “Why are you looking at me that way? Please, I don’t want you to cry. If you do, I...” “You can’t cry though, Michi.” Aisuru said to her. Michi knew that was true and replied back, “I can’t cry, but I do have feelings.”


Chapter 2 of my story. I put this here to show you a part in this story.

[astro_mcfly]

Hello. Here I am, back again. I have gotten to somewhere around the 65th page of my story now! My friends say that's insanly weird that I've gone that far, but it's fun. In the story, something weird is going on. I'm not going to say, because that would ruin reading it!

[jeffbert]

Please give us a brief summary of your plot. All this secretive talk is giving me curiosity, but you still remain silent about the details.

[astro_mcfly]

What would you like to know? I could tell you lots, or just improve the little thing I did at the top of the page. Sorry. I'm confused.

[super_kim]

Hi, I'm part of a critique group for authors. We swap work, heavily critisize it, hand it back and make changes accordingly. It kills to have someone rip your work to pieces but it helps in the end. I would love to have a look at what you have written, it sounds interesting.

And when you have it completed, you could get it appraised. A manuscript appraisal is usually charged per word, so shop around for someone with a low price and a good reputation before u decide. An appraisal points out the areas of your novel that need work to get it publisher ready.

Kim.

And I think jeffbert justs wants a straight summary rather than an attention grabbing blurb (which is quite good, it makes you interested in the story, without giving too much away).