My Astro Boy Doujinshi

[adrian _68]

This is the first six pages of my Doujinshi. I have no plans of inking it. This is the best I can edit it. If you like my work tell me and if you don't like it, I will stop my doujinshi here. I will try to post the next pages, maybe next week. Enjoy!

[Breakman]

Very nice. Let's walk though my review of it? ^_^

I really like how you had the same character proportion (not varying in characters being too big, small, different drawing style) through out the comic, the speech bubbles seem to be "planned before" drawing the panels (except for page two; you drew the picture but "forgot" that you needed a speech bubble), and all the characters look so young and cute (you really want to adopt them! .

On the negative side... You changed the text style three times (usually anything in italics seem that the character is sounding sly, smooth talking, or something ;^^), the text is also too small at times (page 3 + 4; I totally skipped reading those panels), and even though the characters look young and cute, they don't follow the official character designs (some people get turned off if comic artists stray too far from the originals (year 2000 designs in this instance)).

Things that I want to note is that it looks like you used only soft and hard pencils. That's why it is so "dirty" looking. Try using pencils as only for rough drafts and using ink pins as finals. Be careful! Don't touch the ink while inking! That's worse than pencil smearing!

Over all, great job! I am glad you had the courage to even draw the comic. I will be looking forward to reading more from you (unless it's hentai or yaoi, then bye-bye ;^^). B)

[adrian _68]

Sorry if i made the comics in pencil. I don't know how to ink yet. I will be derived from shadings if use ink.

[LLJade]

Where is it?

Lauren

[adrian _68]

The post is modified again.
you can check it out now.

[LLJade]

You chibified Atlas? ............CUTE!!!!! *Hugs Chibi Atlas tightly* Can I have him? Can I, can I, can I? Please? *gives you puppy dog expression* He's just so darn cute! Oh, btw, love how the dj is coming along! Maybe when you're done with that one, you could do one of Atlas and my version of Livian?

Lauren

[Spirit]

WOW!! Your really did a awesome job! The story is very good so far!


I love the way your drew altas he so cute ^^ and astro outfit is so adorable !


You captured there expression very well!! I can't wait to see more!

Hey do you have paintshop pro7? If ya did you could out line them(like inking but with no messes) with that prgram plus there a toning option in the brushes ^^ its really good.

Btw i'll post up my doujinshi so you can see how it is so far later this week! okay!!


And keep up the awesome job on your doujinshi

[Dragonrider1227]

Cool! Atlas kinda looks like a girl but that's okay.

[Strange Wings]

:wahah: That's a fantastic manga work, adrian_68!
God, I wish I'd have your talents.

As for the inking: I wouldn't colour it either. It's much better in b/w and in different shades of gray, in fact that's what adds mood and vividness to it. Most mangas are in b/w anyway.
It's the same with the movies. B/w films are still more impressive than the coloured ones, just look at A. Hitchcock early works.

Good story too!

[adrian _68]

Originally posted by LLJade@Sep 1 2004, 10:24 PM
You chibified Atlas? ............CUTE!!!!! *Hugs Chibi Atlas tightly* Can I have him? Can I, can I, can I? Please? *gives you puppy dog expression* He's just so darn cute! Oh, btw, love how the dj is coming along! Maybe when you're done with that one, you could do one of Atlas and my version of Livian?

Lauren

What's your Version of Livian?